I’m in the metro with Maria on our way to hire a car for a weekend adventure to the Costa Brava & Andorra. At the 2nd stop a young couple sits across the isle and the girl is visibly upset. Her arms are crossed; she’s wearing a frown and has a cold glare toward her boyfriend. He’s pleading with her to forgive him. Apparently they wanted to do different things on this day and he didn’t realize how important it was to share their experiences, therefore must have taken her for granted. An obvious rookie mistake ;-)
Here’s where it gets interesting.. after two more stops, she actually changes body language and starts to open up to him, they begin a dialog and he agrees to share the weekend doing half of what is also important to her. Good recovery mate! Now comes the next rookie mistake, and a fatal one at that, as he starts to justify himself by bringing into the conversation her mother, sister and I even believe he mentioned her dog. Dude.. she accepted your apology and you guys were headed toward a great weekend. Let the justification go. You can’t bring into one conversation unsolved issues from two weeks ago!
So you can obviously figure that she, crossed her arms again, pouted angrily and withdrew to the comfort of her seat. Understanding he had blown it.. he pleaded again, and this time only gained her sympathy when he started to cry. Obviously loving her, it hurt him to see that he had hurt the woman he loved. His tears caused her to open up again, embrace him and made-up by the last stop.
What’s the moral of this story? 1st, don’t always think only of yourself. By considering what she might like to do, you’ll actually have more fun together vs. going alone, or going with her beside but still being alone! 2nd, once she’s accepted your apology.. if it’s sincere.. STOP! You’ve been forgiven! 3rd, deal with your issues when they come up, not 2 weeks later when you’re trying to win an argument, or make your ego feel better because you think you’ve “given in”.